Happy Hanauers: Nana's Coming Home! (Or, "Why I'm the World's Biggest Wimp.")

Tax day has come and gone, which means....

Nana’s coming home!

My mom (AKA Nana) splits her time between California and Arkansas, which is where my sister lives and owns an accounting firm with her husband. During the tax season, my sister and BIL almost never make it home. Instead they camp out at one of those extended stay hotels and live on coffee and Starbucks oatmeal. So my mom takes care of their kids and dog while my sister and BIL are off earning enough money to have an awesome house with a pool (complete with waterfall) and to buy me expensive Christmas gifts like KitchenAid stand mixers and gift certificates to Chez Panisse.

But now that April 15th has come and gone, it’s our turn to have Nana. She heads back first thing tomorrow morning, which, in Nana-time, means she’ll hit the road around 2pm.

At the same time my mom will be driving her pickup truck full of hand-me-down top-of-the-line baby gear halfway across the country, Andy and Collin will be flying to Boston for Collin’s last college tour. I, on the other hand, will be at home with two precious munchkins, one of whom was just re-diagnosed with some kind of lingering RSV horribleness and doesn’t sleep. And the other is Rachel. I imagine I will have 2 to 3 days of solo parenting, and I am overcome with parental cowardice at the thought.

Which brings me to my next point: I am the world’s biggest wimp.

Let’s compare:

1996 to 2009: Attended college as a single parent, graduated magna cum laude, double major. Attended law school as a single parent (did NOT graduate magna cum laude, but hey, it’s Boalt. We don’t put stock in such things). Worked days, nights, weekends, exercised all the time, ate well, had a spotless house, and never slept. Had lots of energy leftover for fun.

2009 to present: Co-parenting three children along with one part-time live-in Grandma who will get night shifts if necessary, babysits at the drop of a hat, and (almost) never says “no” to any halfway reasonable request. Other Grandma lives about 3 blocks away, has Rachel at least one day a week, often more. I work sometimes, seldom get exercise, have chocolate cake for breakfast, and I won’t even tell you who cleans my house. Have no energy leftover for fun.

Even if not technically a “wimp,” I have, at the very least, gotten soft. And this really bugs me. Okay, sure, I was in my teens and twenties between 1996 and 2007. And I had fewer children. And I had the built-in fun of college and law school classmates. But really? I’ve been reduced to a mom who, after finding out she would be solo parenting for a handful of days, begins blowing up her mom’s cell phone to confirm just exactly when she would arrive into town, and inquiring whether the other grandma could possibly fit in a sleepover with Rachel?

Part of the problem is my new inability to drink coffee after about 1pm. That drastically decreases my quality of life and mothering abilities. Another part of my problem is having a husband who will let me be wimpy. If he’s in Boston, who will split night wakings with me? Who will make the bottles? Who will take out the trash Sunday night? (Oh, wait. My mom will be here by Sunday.) The list could go on and on. So really, it’s all Andy’s fault. In fact, it’s gotten so bad that the baby will go to Andy as happily and readily as he will to me. I think that’s a problem we need to fix.

My new experiment will be to see if letting Andy sit on the couch, watching baseball and drinking chocolate milk, will bring back my old energy. The experiment will last until approximately mid-summer, which is when Nana will head back to Arkansas.